1x red head

I go red A LOT. Not just like blushing a little bit from time to time. That would be endearing.

My red head is not endearing. It is proper Watch Out Your Whole Body Might Get Burnt Off If You Stand Next To Me red. People point me out to their friends when I’m going red because they’ve never seen anything like it. And then they get even more excited because I somehow manage to go even redder from embarrassment of being red.

Some reasons I go red:

• I can feel myself going red 
• I think to myself "don't go red" 
• I am on a date and the man is very attractive
• I am on a date and the man is very unattractive 
• I am on a date and the man is speaking very loudly 
• I am on a date and I think the people around me know I’m on a date 
• no reason 

NB: list not exhaustive.

One time I went to meet a boy for a date and the place where he had sat himself down in the pub meant we were kind of in the middle of a whole big area of nothing. So I started going red because it felt like everyone was looking at us. I thought I would go to the toilet to see how red I was. Maybe I just imagined I was red and it really wasn't that bad.

It really was that bad. My head equalled 1x tomato. I decided there were 3 options:

1. Stay in toilet until redness diminished (15-20 minutes). Decided against this as explanation for length of time spent in toilet potentially more embarrassing.
2. Escape out back door of toilets. Option dismissed. Didn’t want nice boy to think he’d done something wrong.
3. Return to boy and say “ok, so – my head is red. sorry about that. can’t really do anything about it” and get on with the date. 

Chose Option 3. Boy gave me a lovely vegetarian cookbook but didn’t ever call me again. Ho Hum.