standing on the edge of the mat

new-age people have funny ways of speaking.

in my Pilates class, the instructor always says things like “now, find yourself standing on the edge of the mat”.

I struggle to just discover myself standing there. I usually have to make a conscious effort and move certain muscles to get to that position.

perhaps she actually means I should “find myself” whilst standing on the edge of the mat.

I wished I’d known sooner that that was possible. if one could find oneself whilst standing on the edge of the mat, life would be a whole lot easier.

I probably wouldn’t have spent quite so much money on the psychologist or self-help books or tissues or massive packets of cheese and onion chips.

there could be a Coming of Age ritual for teenagers where they Stand On The Edge Of The Mat at age 18 to find themselves. after that, everyone would know who they were and what they should do, and life would be a whole lot less messy.

I like the idea that standing on the edge of the mat is a way to find yourself.

sitting in the middle of the mat is safe and secure. you can sit there for quite a long time without feeling uncomfortable.

but if you’re standing on the edge of the mat, it’s a bit more precarious.

you have to balance with your toes and try not to fall over and land in an ungraceful pile on the mat whilst also uttering a most unladylike oof, as that would be quite embarrassing and make you go red and give you thoughts of never being able to show your face in that class again. I would imagine.

standing on the edge of the mat is harder. and there is potential for severe embarrassment. but I think I’d rather be there than sitting safely in the middle.

now to just solve the problem of how to suddenly realise I'm standing on the edge of the mat without having moved a muscle...